


Eight Simple Rules for Dating My Mother

by grrriliketigers



Series: Slow Dancing in a Burning Room [2]
Category: The Devil Wears Prada (2006)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-03
Updated: 2013-04-03
Packaged: 2017-12-07 09:06:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/746763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grrriliketigers/pseuds/grrriliketigers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to Slow Dancing, Part 2 in the series</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Rule #1: Just because I’m happy that she’s happy doesn’t mean you need to rub it in. Love, Cassidy**

Miranda was sitting in the den with the sketches of the new summer collection when the twins bounded in. They leapt onto the couch with her and snuggled right up. 

“These are pretty.” Cassidy lifted the page up to look at the page behind it. “Which one’s yours?”

“None of them, Donatella’s designing my dress for Paris this year.” Miranda took off her glasses and kissed both of their temples. “How was your weekend? I missed you terribly.”

“No, you didn’t, not even a little bit.” Caroline smiled, “you got to spend the weekend with your girlfriend.” 

“A girlfriend is no substitute for my two favorite girls.” Miranda said sincerely, “did you do anything interesting this weekend that you didn’t even bother to call me and tell me about?” 

“Dad let us drive a little bit,” Cassidy shrugged.

“It was kind of lame. We just drove around a parking lot.” Caroline sighed, “I’m not really crazy about driving.” 

“Right, it’s not like we don’t have a driver.” Cassidy rolled her eyes. “When’s Paris again?”

“In two weeks.” 

“Can we go this year? Please, please?” Caroline batted her eyelashes and tried her best to look like the very saddest puppy.

“I don’t feel good about taking you out of school for fashion week.” Miranda shook her head firmly. “I’ll take you to Paris sometime this summer.”

“Promise?” Caroline grinned.

“Cross my heart.” Miranda nodded, “you two should get to bed, you have school in the morning. Did you do your homework?” 

“Yes…” 

“Did you really?”

“…no.”

Miranda looked at her watch, “well, don’t stay up too late.” 

The girls nodded begrudgingly. “Alright. Goodnight, mom.” They each kissed a cheek.

“Goodnight, girls.” Miranda put her glasses back on. Caroline retreated up the stairs but Cassidy hung back in the doorway. Miranda looked up, “yes, Bobbsey?”

“Could I go out tomorrow evening?”

“No.” 

“Mom, please, I swear I’ll be back by nine.” Cassidy pleaded.

“Sweetheart, _no_. I love you and I’m sorry if your social life is shriveling and dying but you’re still grounded.” 

“Haven’t I been punished enough?” Cassidy sighed and Miranda pursed her lips. “When am I ungrounded?”

“I’ll let you know when it feels right.” Miranda stopped Cassidy from speaking by continuing, “you routinely snuck out of the house to go to adult clubs which means that you made or bought a fake id. I can’t even begin to fathom the end of your punishment for that.” 

“You ran away from home when you were sixteen! I don’t know why you’re so mad at me for this when you totally did worse!” 

“It is not open for discussion, Cassidy. Go do your homework.” 

“This is so unfair.” Cassidy scowled.

“You have no one to blame but yourself.”

“Not the way I see it.” She muttered under her breath.

“So, from your point of view, whose fault is it?” Miranda raised her eyebrows, daring Cassidy to dig herself a deeper hole.

“Um, I would actually say this is Andy’s fault.” Cassidy crossed her arms over her chest. “If she had just left well enough alone, you would never have found out. So, uh, yeah, I would say that the blame actually falls on your little girlfriend.” 

“Cassidy, go to your room.” Miranda pursed her lips. 

“ _Goodnight_ , Mom.” Cassidy sneered, disappearing from the room. 

Miranda tossed the sketches onto the coffee table with annoyance and leaned back on the couch. She sighed heavily and ran her fingers through her hair. She took her glasses off again and set them down on top of the sketches. 

She pulled out her phone and called Andy. 

“Leslie, I’d like to make a statement to the press this morning, set that up for me.” Miranda closed the phone and dialed Emily, when her first assistant answered, she started, “have an extra coffee waiting for me and push the run through to first thing, clear my schedule from ten to noon. Get Demarchelier to confirm. I want to redo my office, get that interior designer that I like, the one who did that benefit that I went to last year.”

Cassidy pushed her eggs around her plate with her toast triangle. Miranda shut the phone, “Cassidy, eat your breakfast.”

“I’m starving myself so I can tell everyone that you have strict and unrealistic expectations for us.” 

“Well, as long as you have goals,” Miranda decided she wasn’t going to argue with her so early in the morning. She gulped down the rest of her coffee. Cassidy sneered at her.

Caroline popped the last bite of toast into her mouth, “I’m the good daughter, mom.”

Miranda kissed Caroline’s forehead, “you’re both good daughters, Cassidy’s just a little wayward right now.” 

“Can I go out with some friends after school today?” Caroline asked, sipping her orange juice.

“Yes, of course you may.” Miranda nodded, “should I expect you for dinner or not?”

“I don’t know, I’ll call you, okay?”

“That’s fine.” 

Cassidy gawked, “oh come on! I totally asked the same thing and you said no!” 

“Caroline is not grounded.” Miranda put a hand on her hip. Cassidy and Caroline’s phones beeped. “Your driver is waiting for you.” 

Cassidy cast Miranda a sidelong dirty look as she stalked out of the kitchen with Caroline. Once on the sidewalk their driver, Taylor, opened the door for them. Settling into the plush seats Caroline shook her head.

“What?” Cassidy rolled her eyes.

“You really don’t understand how to deal with mom at all. You push and she’ll push back twice as hard. You’re never going to get ungrounded the way you’re going.” 

“This sucks.” Cassidy sighed heavily and kicked her backpack. “So who are you going out with?” 

Caroline grinned, “Derek and I are going on a double date with Rebecca and Jackson. We’re going to the Met and probably get coffee or something.” 

“Lucky.” 

“Is that thing with Kiki going anywhere?” 

“Well, I haven’t had much opportunity to spend much time with her so I don’t know. I’m definitely interested and she’s clearly interested but I don’t know how sure she is that she wants to date women because we’ve never really talked about it. The party was the first indication she’d ever given to me. I’m trying not to get my hopes up too high.” Cassidy sighed, “I just hope she doesn’t lose interest while I wait to get ungrounded.”

“Fair enough.” Caroline nodded. “But like I said, stop trying to agitate mom. That’s really not going to get you anywhere.”

“You have your goody two shoes method and I have mine.”

“Whatever,” Caroline laughed, “it’s your social life.” 

Miranda slipped her Dolce and Gabbana sunglasses onto her nose and slid into the town car. Andy smiled at her from the other side of the backseat. 

“Good morning, beautiful.” Andy smiled. 

Miranda cupped her cheek and kissed her sweetly. Andy’s fingers played with the shortest hairs on the back of Miranda’s neck. Miranda’s driver, Carl, tried really hard not to look back at them as he pulled into traffic.

“So what’s the occasion?” Andy rubbed her nose against Miranda’s.

“I’m issuing a press statement today and I’d like you to be there.” Miranda used her finger to trace Andy’s jaw line. “I’m officially coming out today.”

Andy’s jaw dropped. “You’re kidding!” 

“I’m quite serious.” Miranda leaned back against the seat. “I’m much too old to play games. I also figured that since I plan to take you out and lavish attention on you that I should do it first before Page Six does it for me, right?” 

“Are you sure, Miranda?” Andy searched her eyes.

“Sure that I love you? Yes. Sure that I make no apologies for loving you? Yes.” Miranda scrolled through her Blackberry, “sure that I want to do it and not let Page Six do it for me? Yes.” 

“That’s a big step, Miranda. I’m proud of you.” Andy took her hand. 

The phone rang and Miranda flipped it open. “What time?” Miranda waited, “I’m just making a statement, I’m not answering questions.” She shut the phone. “I’m not undergoing a personality change, of course I’m not answering questions.” She rolled her eyes. 

“You’re amazing, Miranda.”

“I know.” Miranda batted her eyelashes at Andy playfully. “I don’t think it’s possible to keep your name out of it, but I can ask Leslie to try.” 

Andy shrugged, “it’s not a big deal. I never thought that I’d show up in Page Six at all.” 

“Stick with me, kid.” 

The car stopped in front of Elias-Clarke and Andy reached for the handle but Miranda put her hand on her arm and shook her head, “Andrea, no.”

Carl opened the door and gave a small bow of submission to the women inside. Miranda let go of Andy’s arm and nodded towards the door. 

Cassidy sat in her last period class and stared hopefully at the clock, watching each agonizing second tick by unfazed by her agitation and ill-will. As the minute hand finally clicked over the six signifying 2:30 and the bell sounded through the classroom Cassidy leapt up and, along with a sea of her classmates, booked it for the front door.

“Yo Cass.” 

“Hey Doug. What’s up?” 

“Jane and George and I are going to the mall. You should come.” He fell into step next to her.

Cassidy shook her head with resignation, “no can do, Doug. I’m super mega-grounded, I told you that.”

“Sneak out like usual.” Doug shrugged.

“My mom is so pissed at me, she’s being super vigilant. There’s no way I could swing it.” Cassidy sighed as they stepped out into the courtyard. Cassidy slipped on her Vera Wang sunglasses.

“Nah, but she’s all into her girlfriend or whatever, right?” 

Cassidy stopped her friend and turned to look at him with furrowed brow. “How do you know about her girlfriend?”

“Oh, well, the news was on in study hall and there was a recap of the press statement she gave this morning.” Doug shrugged, “you knew about it, right?”

“Yeah, no, I knew…” Cassidy was in shock, “I can’t believe she went public with it.”

“Must be pretty serious, huh?” Doug smiled a little, “what with the girlfriend standing behind her looking totally Jackie O. She’s cute enough. Do you know how old she is?” Doug’s cell phone beeped.

Cassidy shook her head. “This is ridiculous. How is it that my love life is falling to pieces and she’s the belle of the ball, as per usual? I cannot believe she went public for Andy.” Cassidy sighed heavily. “Doug, I have to go home. I have to play angel so my mom will want to unground me, you guys have fun, okay?”

“Aw, Cass, Kiki just confirmed that she’s coming to the mall.” 

Cassidy groaned, “tell her I miss her and I’ll call her later. I really can’t go.” 

Doug shrugged, “suit yourself. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Cassidy stalked off toward the row of idling cars to find Taylor. She passed by a newspaper stand and was assaulted by a front page picture of Miranda staring out with an icy expression that showed her disgust at being photographed. The white block lettering beneath her face read: “Who’s Melting the Ice Queen?”

Cassidy snatched one of the magazines. She couldn’t believe that it had hit newsstands already. As she flipped through the newsprint pages, staining her fingertips with the cheap ink, the man behind the kiosk barked, “hey kid, those aren’t free!”

Cassidy turned a patented Priestly glare at the unfortunate man. “Get over yourself.” She spat as she threw a ten at him and continued on her walk to the car. 

Taylor smiled at her, like usual, and opened the door for her. She dropped down into the seat heavily and haphazardly discarded the bag next to her. Finally she located the article on Miranda and began to read. 

“Taylor, have you seen this?” She demanded.

“No, Ms. Priestly.”

“The Wicked Witch just came out of the closet in a global venue and she’s being praised.” Cassidy sighed heavily, “which, you know, don’t get me wrong, good for her, but I just feel like there’s nothing she does that doesn’t come up roses and it seems so unfair.” 

Taylor remained silent. He knew that Cassidy intended for him to be a sounding board and not to offer any actual words of wisdom.

“Even Irv Ravitz praised her.” She shook the newspaper in disgust. “he says: ‘Miranda and I are frequently divided on a lot of issues, mostly over her budget, but the fact of it is is that she’s good at what she does and she sells magazines.’ I mean, it wasn’t a rave review, he basically said I hated her before, I hate her now but it doesn’t sound like he plans to try and fire her or anything. I don’t even want to read Andy’s quote. It’s undoubtedly some sickeningly saccharine thing dripping with love and admiration.

“If she were a politician she’d be ripped to shreds but because she’s already part of this subculture, she’s already a bitch and a half without any apologies so it’s like no big thing, you know? No one expects her to be pious so it’s not a big shock. Plus, it’s totally not like there aren’t a shitton of gay people in fashion. If you’re going to come out in any industry it should really be fashion. Like, at a fashion meeting someone stands up and says ‘hi, I’m gay’ and they’re answered by a sea of ‘me too.’”

Cassidy spent the rest of the ride listing all the reasons why Miranda’s smooth outcoming was unfair and unrealistic. When the car rolled up to the curb in front of the looming townhouse Cassidy shoved the magazine in her bag and got out, ascending the steps.

She swung open the door, surprised to find Miranda and Andy waiting in the foyer.

“Cassidy,” Miranda started but Cassidy cut her off. 

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Cassidy grumbled as she disappeared up the stairs and into her room.


	2. Chapter 2

**rule #2: she gets home in time to say goodnight to us. Period.**

“I’m done forcing a smile at people who I don’t recognize and couldn’t care less about.” Miranda grumbled as she whisked Andy out of the grandly decorated hall.

Andy smiled at Miranda, “it’s not as bad as all that.” Andy gave Miranda’s hand a squeeze, “you just came out of the closet and that makes you this mysterious enigma, this person that everyone made assumptions about and their assumptions were challenged so they just want to pinch you and see if you’re real.”

Miranda raised a questioning eyebrow at Andy’s choice of words.

“So to speak.” Andy rolled her eyes good-naturedly.

Miranda pulled Andy close. “If they do pinch they’ll be missing a few limbs.” 

“What if I pinch?”

“There’s a different recourse for you.” Miranda nuzzled her ear and nibbled on it gently, causing Andy to moan softly and lean into her. “Now I’m going to take you to dinner.”

“Miranda, it’s awfully late, maybe we should call it a night?”

“Why?” Miranda’s teeth scraped sensually over the shell of Andy’s ear, “because it’s a school night?”

Andy giggled softly, her body moving against Miranda’s, the fabric of their dresses crinkling together. 

“I’ll write you a note,” she whispered, “regretfully, Andrea will not be in this morning because she had to go to a romantic late night dinner and then had to be thoroughly ravished.” 

“Ravished, hm?” 

“ _Thoroughly_ ravished.” Miranda trailed a finger down Andy’s exposed back. 

The twins looked at the clock again. “They’re probably finishing up dinner now.” Cassidy shrugged.

“Right, because she’d only stay at the gala for, like, ten minutes.” Caroline agreed, studying the clock. “Then dinner and they should be back any time now.”

“Do you think she’ll have Andy stay the night now that we know?”

“You think she hasn’t already?” Caroline lifted an eyebrow.

Cassidy shook her head.

Caroline scoffed, “that’s naïve.” 

“No, I mean, I’m sure she’s stayed over when we were at Dad’s but I don’t think she’s stayed over when we were home.”

“Why not?”

“I think we would have heard something. When Stephen lived here you could hear his footsteps on the floor upstairs at all hours of the night.”

“Okay, granted, but that’s assuming three things: one, that Andy weighs as much as Stephen, two, Andy is as inconsiderate as Stephen and three, that Andy is also a 60-year-old man with a prostate problem.” Caroline smirked.

Cassidy rolled her eyes, “alright, but we can hear Mum walk around sometimes and, presumably, she weighs less than Andy – and before you get all uppity about it I base that on the fact that Mum is a size 0 and Andy is a size 4 _and_ Andy is taller.”

“Muscle weighs more than fat.” Caroline quipped, “you’ve seen Mum’s calves, haven’t you? She’s practically ripped. There is totally a chance that Mum weighs more than Andy.”

“Without any real concrete evidence!” Cassidy protested, “you can’t just assume that there’s enough extra weight in Mum’s calf muscles to offset the width and height difference! In fact, besides being a blatant assumption it’s not even very logical.” 

“You can’t just say that my argument is invalid just because you don’t think it’s logical. I’m not saying that it’s all in her calf muscles. I’m assuming that the rest of her stays fit, too. She’s all about her appearance, you don’t think she’d work out?”

“ _When_?” Cassidy demanded. “She works 20 hours of every day. She doesn’t have time to go to the gym. The only reason that her calves are so defined is because she walks around in stilettos. I can say that your argument is invalid if it legitimately makes no fucking sense.”

Both twins sighed heavily and avoided looking at each other for a few minutes. Caroline looked over at the clock and then back at her sister, “look, all I’m saying is that they should be back any minute. It’s 10:30 on a school night and Mum would wish us good night before bed.” 

“Agreed.” Cassidy nodded. “And she would never condone us staying up much later than this.”

“Right. So why are we arguing?” 

Welcome to My Life by Simple Plan rang out and Caroline rolled her eyes. Cassidy pulled her phone from her pocket. “Hi Kiki… no, no, don’t worry, we’re waiting up for my mother. I have a little time.” 

Andy’s cheeks were red and warm from the wine that had flowed freely throughout dinner. At 25 she felt that she should know and acknowledge the fact that she can’t hold her wine, and yet every time she got taken out on a date and wine was ordered she would find herself drinking more than she ought. 

Miranda watched her with amusement, sipping her own wine. Miranda was well aware of Andy’s reaction to wine and was well prepared for an evening of entertainment. 

“Shall I pour you another glass?” 

“Okay.” Andy giggled, holding up her glass. 

Miranda took Andy’s glass out of her hand and held it behind her back. “Kiss first, wine second.” 

“How about kiss first, wine second, kiss third?” Andy cupped her cheek and pressed her lips firmly to Miranda’s. Fingertips softly caressed the prominent cheekbone, Miranda’s eyes fluttered shut. 

Drunk or not, Andy was an inspired kisser. 

Her kisses and soft touches made Miranda’s whole body flush with admiration. It wasn’t wholly sexual – there was a different kiss for that – it was soft and caring. Miranda had scarcely met anyone who really knew the difference between the kisses that Andy could so masterfully distinguish and utilize to their full potential. 

As Andy pulled back, leaving Miranda poised with lips parted and eyes staring dreamily into space, she wondered who had really intoxicated whom. 

Miranda looked down at the finished meal and back up at her doe-eyed lover. She called for the check and grabbed the bottle of wine to go, making haste for the town car. Visions of a champagne bath danced in her head and she blushed softly under her mineral make-up at the thought of lapping Pinot Grigio out of Andy’s belly button.

Miranda was snapped out of her reverie when Carl laid on the horn. She scowled and was about to dive into a full blown lecture about the savagery of engaging in petty horn blowing in New York traffic when Andy caught her by the shoulder and pulled her close. 

Andy’s breath was sweet and wine flavored as her lips hovered in front of Miranda’s. “You are the most beautiful woman in the world.” Andy whispered.

Miranda ran her fingers over Andy’s jawline. “Close. Second most beautiful woman in the world.” 

Andy’s fingers slipped into Miranda’s soft and shiny white hair. Miranda reveled in the feeling of Andy’s carressing fingertips against her scalp. She let out a soft sigh and thought, _this is why I love this woman. One of the plethora of reasons._

Miranda took Andy’s other hand and turned it over. She leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Andy’s pulsepoint, sucking softly. 

Andy leaned into Miranda, sucking in a breath as Carl pulled up to the curb. 

Miranda cursed having to put their moment on hold as she climbed out of the car with Andy in tow, clutching the wine bottle. Pulling her immense keyring out of her tiny purse, Miranda unlocked the door and stepped into the foyer. 

The room was dark and she imagined that the twins had gone to bed hours ago. She looked at the clock, it was almost 12:30. Andy tripped over the upturned corner of the runner and let out an embarrassed giggle.

Miranda indulged in a smile, catching her and gently shushing her. “The girls are asleep,” she whispered.

“Sorry.” Andy whispered back, her arms wrapped loosely around Miranda. 

The foyer flooded with light and Miranda and Andy had to squint and shield their eyes until they adjusted to the illumination. “Girls,” Miranda said with surprise, “what are you doing out of bed?”

Cassidy put her hands on her hips, “we waited up for you.”

Caroline folded her arms across her chest. “You always say goodnight to us.”

“You’re right, girls, of course.” Miranda took the wine bottle from Andy. “Why don’t you go get into bed and I’ll kiss you goodnight in a minute after I put this away?”

The girls nodded and Miranda disappeared into the depths of the townhouse. The twins’ eyes turned to Andy. 

Andy bit the inside of her lip, “hi.” 

“In future,” Caroline started, pursing her lips, “you make sure she gets home in time to say good night to us. She says good night to us every night. Period.”

“But you know your mother! I can’t just dictate when we leave.” Andy stammered. 

Cassidy stopped her, “it’s not a discussion. She gets home to say good night.” The twins gave Andy withering glares before turning and climbing the stairs to their bedrooms. 

Miranda re-emerged and found Andy in the foyer looking bewildered. She stepped forward and pressed her lips against Andy’s. “Why don’t _you_ go climb into my bed?”

“Is it really such a good idea? I mean… the girls…” 

Miranda laid a finger over Andy’s lips. Andy looked up into Miranda’s blue pools. Miranda pressed her lips against Andy’s. Andy leaned into Miranda and kissed her deeply. 

When the kiss broke, Andy pulled back, nodding. “Yeah, great idea. Got it. I’ll be in bed.”


	3. Chapter 3

**rule #3: You come to pick her up you say hi to us too. We also live there.**

“Mom?” Cassidy walked into the room. 

“No.” Miranda didn’t look up from her notes. 

Cassidy sighed heavily, “I didn’t even ask you anything yet. How can you just say no? You don’t even know. Maybe I needed you to take me to the emergency room or something.”

“Technically possible, but you don’t.” 

Cassidy crossed her arms over her chest and scowled. 

“Stop pouting.” Miranda flipped a page in her notes, “you’re not going out. You can go back to your room and think about how much you hate me if that’ll make you feel better.”

“You’re going out tonight, aren’t you?” 

“Yes, I am.”

“Did you do your homework?” Cassidy teased.

Miranda looked up with an amused little smile, “trying to.” She waved the pages of notes. “Did you do yours?”

“Yeah.” She nodded. “I’ve been very good and very quiet.”

“Yes you have, Bobbsey. You’re being incredibly uncharacteristically well-mannered. I’m pleased.” 

“But I still can’t go out?”

“The end is in sight but it’s still a ways away.” 

“Mom!” Cassidy protested.

“Do I have to list your infractions again?”

“No.” Cassidy pouted, kicking the molding of the doorframe, she looked up at her mother again, “I remember what I did.”

“I’m actually willing to bet that there’s more besides but I won’t ask you to elaborate.” Miranda was actually amused.

“And they say you have no heart.” 

“I deplore details, you know.” Miranda smirked, “what’s most important is that you know what you did and you know that I’m hugely disappointed in you and your judgement.”

“I didn’t do any of it out of spite or a desire to rebel against your authority.” Cassidy gazed across the room, bearing her sincerity wholeheartedly. “I did it because I was the only one I really knew who was gay and I felt alone. I thought I was an adult because of how much insight I thought I had on myself and I know definitively how childish I really am because of the awful way I acted. I really am sorry, mom, and _not_ just sorry because I got caught. I’m sorry I assumed that you’d be judgemental because you’re such can amazing mother and, you know, it’s like it pisses me off when people underestimate you and boy, did I fall into that same trap.” 

Miranda pondered her daughter for a moment. She was struck by the honesty. 

Miranda set down her notes and extended her arms for Cassidy, her sassy extroverted A twin. Cassidy approached, head bowed and crawled into her mother’s lap. Miranda kissed her forehead. “I love you, baby, with the entirety of my being. You can always come talk to me about anything, Cassidy, I will always be here for you.” 

“I know, mom.” Cassidy sniffled against her mother’s Donna Karan blouse. She squeezed her tightly, “I love you too.”

“I’ll tell you what, baby doll.” Miranda started, quickly doing the calculations in her head. “The end of the month is in eleven days. At the end of the month it will have been a month and a half you can be released from your punishment. Is that fair?” 

“Thank you, mom.” Cassidy closed her eyes, letting Miranda stroke her hair comfortingly. After a few silent moments she lifted her head, “where are you and Andy going tonight?” 

“I have no idea, actually, she’s surprising me.”

“Uh-oh, that sounds dangerous.” Cassidy raised her eyebrows. 

Miranda smiled a little. Admittedly, she was a little worried but knew she would indulge Andy whatever she wanted. “We shall see, won’t we?”

“I pity Andy if you hate it.” 

Miranda shrugged a little, “I probably won’t tell her if I hate it.”

“…who are you?” 

Miranda smiled, “when you really love someone, if they’re really worth it even extremely stubborn old ladies like me can compromise.”

“You really like her that much?”

“I do, sweetheart,” Miranda nodded, “I feel differently about her than I’ve ever felt about anyone.”

Cassidy stopped to think for a moment. “Is she the first woman you’ve been with?”

Miranda shook her head, “no. I knew pretty early on that I was also interested in women.”

“So you are bisexual, Caroline and I were talking about it.” 

Miranda smiled, “you two are cute.” She kissed Cassidy’s forehead. “I have to get ready to go out, but I love you and we can talk some more tomorrow.”

“I’d like that,” Cassidy got off of Miranda’s lap and walked to the door, “I mean, since I am a captive audience and all until the end of the month.”

Roy pulled Andy up to the curb. She looked at the clock, it was eight and the twins would still be up. Considering that the last time she’d seen them they’d given her a stinging lecture she wanted to avoid another one. 

She pulled out her cell phone and thought about it for a moment. It was childish to avoid the twins. She was afraid of teenaged girls! Damn right she was afraid of teenaged girls, teenagers are scary, they’re governed purely by their hormones and have an underdeveloped frontal lobe, reason and logic play no part in a teenager’s day to day life. Andy was not going to be fooled, she remembered being sixteen. Teenagers are the scariest demographic outside of nuns with rulers and fascists. 

Andy pushed the second speeddial button on her phone. The call was answered on the second ring, “Andrea.”

“Hi, Roy and I are outside,” 

Miranda was amused. “I’ll be right down.” Miranda put in her earrings and didn’t bother to look in the mirror because she already knew she looked stunning. 

She knocked on Cassidy and Caroline’s doors and after a moment they emerged. “I’m going out,” she kissed their cheeks, “I won’t be back before you go to bed. I love you both, very very much.”

The girls quirked their eyebrows in thought for a moment. “Are you meeting Andy? I thought she was picking you up…”

“She’s outside.”

“She’s not coming in?

“Apparently not.” Miranda smiled indulgently. 

The girls were silent for another few moments. “You look really good, mom.” They both nodded their concurrence.

“Thank you, babies.”

“We love you too. Have a good time.”

“Thank you.” The girls watched Miranda walk down the stairs and then out the door. They turned and looked at each other.

“Andy’s avoiding us.”

“Yes,” Cassidy nodded, “yes, she is.”

Caroline smiled and then laughed a little, “that’s kind of funny.”

Cassidy shrugged a little, “mum says she’s really serious about her. That would be major suck if Andy didn’t try to like us or something.”

Caroline nodded in agreement. 

“Oh, but hey, I’m ungrounded at the end of the month.” 

“Good for you, how’d that happen?” 

“I opened up to mom and I was just honest with her.” 

Caroline laughed, “honesty really is the best policy, who’d’ve thunk?”

“Yes,” Cassidy smiled and nodded exaggeratedly, “your advice was right on the money.”

“There are just three things you have to remember about mom: she can smell bullshit a mile away, she hates details and she really hates excuses.” Caroline said, “you just remember those three things and you’re golden.” 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Cassidy rolled her eyes with a laugh, “are you done with your homework?”

“Yup. You?”

“Yup.”

“Couple hands of rummy?”

“I’ll get my wallet.” 

Miranda slid into the backseat after Karl opened the door for her. Andy smiled from the other side and held out a hand for Miranda’s. 

Miranda took it and squeezed it, leaning forward and kissing her hello, then pulling back slightly and smiling playfully said, “you’re afraid of the girls.”

“I… what? No… no… what?” Andy stammered. “I… I just thought that we should get going because it’s late and I know you have to start packing for Paris and stuff.” 

“I don’t leave for Paris for two days.” 

“Miranda,” Andy said very seriously, “I’ve seen your closet. I believe that packing will take you two days.” 

Miranda laughed sweetly and it sounded like honey. She reached over and ran a manicured thumbnail over Andy’s earlobe. Andy marvelled at the way that such a simple touch from Miranda could reduce her to such a girly mess. 

“So where are we going, gorgeous?”

Andy grinned, “it’s a surprise, Miranda, just because we’re minutes away from it doesn’t mean that it isn’t still a surprise.”

“You are such a tease.” 

“I have a hint for you though.” Andy held up a small box enticingly.

“My goodness, you are crafty.” Miranda reached out for the box and Andy grinned more widely and pulled it back.

“Kiss first, box second.” 

Miranda slid even closer to her, slipped her fingers into her hair, tilted her head to the side and pressed her lips against Andy’s beautiful plump red painted lips. Andy’s eyes slipped shut and before she knew it Miranda had slid the box from her hand and had begun to open it.

“You’re sneaky.”

Miranda tugged on the ribbon and pulled the lid off of the little black box. She peeled the tissue paper away and pulled out two gloves that were missing the thumb, middle and ring fingers. 

She raised an eyebrow at Andy. “My hint is that you ruined a pair of gloves?” 

Andy laughed, “Miranda, you’re too cute.” Andy took them away from her and slid them onto her hands with little protest. “Flex your fingers to break the gloves in a little.”

“Andrea…”

The car pulled to a stop and Miranda squinted out the window shamelessly, interrupted by Karl opening the door for her. She stepped and onto the curb and didn’t step forward, making Andy, slide out around her. 

Andy put an arm around her waist and helped her forward. “It’s all ours tonight.”

“…what is?”

“Glow Bowl.” Andy laughed, “I’m taking you bowling. I bet no one has ever taken you bowling before.”

“You’ve got me there, sweetheart...” Miranda was undeniably skeptical. “No one has ever dared to try and take me bowling…”

“Well, bowling is kind of important to me because my grandparents owned a bowling alley in Ohio and they watched me when I got home from school so I’ve really been doing it for almost all my life.” 

Miranda tried in vain to look a little more enthusiastic.

“What’s that you say, Miranda? _Andrea, I would never wear shoes that other people have worn, how can you think that I would?_ And to that, I say,” Andy paused for dramatic effect and held up another box, “you don’t have to!”

Miranda pulled the lid off the box and looked up at her thoughtful, albeit misguided lover. “Andrea…” she smiled.

“A blossoming designer who lives in my building, named Paula Bell, makes shoes and I had her put the bowling shoe bottoms on. I told her that I was giving them to Miranda Priestly and she practically threw them at me. She said that she was floored by the idea of you wearing something that she made. How can you say no to that?”

“The shoes do appear to be very well constructed.” Miranda ran her fingers over the materials, “the stitching looks flawless.”

Andy laid her hands over Miranda’s and drew her attention back up to her face, “Miranda, will you bowl with me?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Rule #4. You break her heart, we break your stuff.**

Miranda felt disoriented and felt like she was caught in a strange whirlwind that somehow dropped her into the middle of a bowling alley. Andy’s voice broke through the haze and brought Miranda’s attention back to reality.

“It’s all in the hips, like baseball… not that I think you’ve ever played that either.”

“Right again, beautiful.” Miranda forced a smile. 

Andy’s hands slid over Miranda’s hips, gave them a gentle squeeze and helped her sway to an imaginary rhythm. 

“Just as long as you keep your hands on my hips and those fingers pointed so deliciously in the direction of a very good time…”

“Miranda, you’re not trying to have a good time at all.” Andy protested with disappointment, stepping back.

Miranda turned around and offered a small guilty smile, “but I’m being tactful.” 

“Small favors, huh?” Andy smirked. “No, it’s fine. I knew it wouldn’t really be your cup of tea. It’s my fault.”

“Don’t do that, don’t be so reasonable.” 

“What do you want me to do, Miranda?” Andy shrugged her shoulders. “I tried and failed. Next time I’ll just be sure to pick a more Miranda-friendly activity.”

“Stop that.” Miranda furrowed her brow. “Stop trying to use reverse psychology on me.”

“I’m not. I picked something you didn’t want to do and I’m not trying to push you. That would be selfish of me.” Andy said, “and I mean it, I knew it wasn’t really your thing.”

As Miranda watched Andy start to pack up her bowling things she felt the guilt welling up in her. She tried to ignore it but finally sighed and said, “wait.”

Andy looked up questioningly. 

“Wait.” Miranda said again, “maybe I’ll roll the ball down the aisle a couple of times. I’ll give it a try.”

“Really? Because you want to and not because I made you feel guilty?” 

“Of course it’s because I feel guilty, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t, but I _love_ you and I did say that I wanted to do something you like to do and I was prepared to have to learn to like something… I’d be a pretty poor excuse for the new compromising Miranda if I didn’t at least roll the ball a couple of times.” 

Andy smiled. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Miranda smiled, “why don’t you roll first?”

Andy smiled more broadly and nodded, “okay. I’m a little rusty, I haven’t played since before I worked for you.” 

“Kept you busy, did I?” Miranda smirked amusedly.

“You bet your ass, you did.” Andy stuck her fingers into the holes, stared the pins down and took two steps forward, swung the ball back and released it at the pins. All but three pins fell. 

Andy flexed her fingers as she waited for her ball to return. When it came out of the chute she picked it up, when she rolled again she knocked down another one and the electronic board recorded her score. 

Andy picked up a red ball, checked its weight and held it out to Miranda and smiled.

Miranda looked at the ball and looked at Andy. “I love you,” she said as she tentatively slid her fingers into the holes. 

“I love you, too, Miranda.”

Miranda held the ball up and walked towards the line and swung her arm and released the ball forcefully. It hurtled down the lane and smashed into the pins, sending all ten of them flying. 

Andy’s mouth dropped in amazement. Miranda’s face fell. “I knocked them all down on the first roll. Can I try again?”

“Miranda, that’s good, that’s a perfect roll!” Andy grinned.

“Oh. I thought the goal was to get as close as you could without going over, like black jack.” Miranda watched as the red ball returned and bumped into Andy’s. 

“If you can do that again I’m going to start thinking that you’re hustling me.” Andy teased, handing her the ball.

“Why am I going again if all the pins have been knocked down?”

“So that you can have a score for the first frame. I got an eight and you’ll get a double digit number, but you have to roll again so we know just how awesome you actually are.”

Miranda rolled her eyes goodnaturedly and took the ball. “For the record,” she stepped forward and flung the ball at the quivering pins, “I am 100% awesome.”

Several frames later, Miranda was still in the lead, she watched Andy line up the shot and then knock down eight pins. 

“Are you letting me win?” 

Andy scoffed and smiled, “I was going to let you win but you are legitimately kicking my ass.” Andy leaned down and kissed Miranda’s amused smile, “figures.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re amazing at everything you ever try to do.” Andy watched Miranda affectionately, “I think you’re such an amazing person.”

“Well, I do have a bit of an advantage. I have a lot of muscle in my right bicep.” Miranda rolled up her sleeve and made a muscle. 

Andy reached up and felt it, her eyes went wide and could only answer, “wow.” 

“I worked in a textile mill when I was 16. It was eight hours a shift on the loom,” Miranda mimed working the loom with her right arm. “The muscle is a fraction of its former glory now, of course, but it’s come in handy more than once.”

“I have a hard time picturing you actually working.” Andy said and then rolled her eyes at herself, “I’m sorry, was that offensive? I didn’t mean that what you do isn’t work, I meant, like, minimum wage, manual labor.” 

“Humble beginnings, my dear.” 

“Tell me about them,” Andy asked gently.

Miranda shook her head, “I don’t give interviews about my childhood.”

“This isn’t an interview, I’m your girlfriend,” Andy furrowed her brow. 

“This is off the record?” 

“I can’t believe you think you have to ask…”

“I’m just kind of touchy about my childhood…” Miranda attempted to explain without sounding very apologetic. “I just don’t really talk about it much.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to poke a stick into old wounds.” Andy apologized, hoping that Miranda hadn’t been abused or abandoned and feeling like a jerk for bringing it up in the first place. “You don’t have to tell me anything that you don’t want to and if you decide to, _yes_ , everything you tell me is off the record.”

Miranda smiled a little, “I would like you to come to Paris. I know you can’t take an entire week off of work, but I would like to fly you over for the Elias-Clark luncheon on the last day and we could fly back together.”

Andy smiled modestly and nuzzled her face into the nape of Miranda’s neck. “You know I’d love to, but you don’t have to fly me over, I could pay for my ticket.”

Miranda stroked Andy’s cheek, “when I say that I would like to fly you over, I do mean that Irv will be paying for your ticket.”

“Miranda!” Andy laughed, “I especially can’t let Irv pay for my ticket!”

“It’s in my budget, calm down.” Miranda teased. “I always add an extra ticket into my budget so that I can take the woman I love to the most romantic city on earth.”

“You always add it into the budget to take the woman you love to Paris?”

“I’ve been adding the ticket for you since the early 90s, I just didn’t know when you’d come around.” Miranda wrapped her arms around Andy’s neck and eskimo kissed her sweetly.

Andy grinned lovingly, “Miranda, you are such a hopeless romantic.” Andy peppered kisses around Miranda’s eyes and nose, “don’t ever change.”

Miranda didn’t make it home until almost one. She peaked in at the girls and smiled at their peacefully sleeping forms, ipod earbuds stuck in each ear. She slipped silently into each room and kissed their foreheads and allowed herself to reminisce about watching them sleep when they were babies. 

She didn’t wish she had those days back, she loved watching her daughters grow up and become women –even if she didn’t always agree with their choices. She was happy to have had their childhoods to dress them in tiny baby clothes and tickle their feet, listening to them laugh and watching their baby fat thin away until it was clear that they had her cheekbones. Now, she was equally glad to get to know them as people, share in their joys and sympathize with their heartaches. 

Miranda fell asleep that night thinking to herself that she must be the luckiest person in the world to have so many wonderful, loving women in her life. 

Packing for Paris was always an easy task because all of the clothes were brand new and they had been decided upon well in advance. Her favorite part of pre-Paris preperations was making everyone else’s days difficult with ridiculous demands. 

Christian Thompson’s pre-Paris preparations had been a lot more aggravating than Miranda’s and even more than her employees’.This was mostly because he seemed not to have any. His flight had accidentally been booked for the week before and when he tried to book a new flight he was informed that there were no open seats until Wednesday and he would miss half of fashion week. 

“…Christian? _Oof!_ ” 

“What?” Christian looked up to find Andy standing up and brushing herself off. “Oh jesus, did I do that?” He bit his lip, “I’m sorry, I was a bit preoccupied.”

Andy laughed, “no kidding.” 

“Let me buy you a drink as my way of apologizing.” 

Andy looked at her watch, “yeah, I guess so, it’s a little early for a drink, but it’s very nearly happy hour, right?” 

“Woman after my own heart.” Christian laughed, he linked arms with her and patted her hand, “you have to tell me about you and Miranda, how does that _happen_? And I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

“Oh, you’re full of it. You can stop, I won’t be going to bed with you again.”

“Andy, my dear, you cut me to the quick.” Christian laid his free hand over his heart, “I do genuinely care about you, not just your _incredibly gorgeous_ body… though I do care for it, as well.”

Andy rolled her eyes but smiled. “You don’t exactly call very often.”

“I’m a busy guy.” Christian shrugged, “you came out to me, you trusted me with that, you’re telling me you don’t want to be my friends? Or were you telling me because you thought I should get tested? You found out you had the gay and you were calling all your former lovers?” 

They both laughed and Andy shook her head. “I kind of got the feeling that you weren’t capable of being friends with a woman that you weren’t sleeping with.”

“No, I’m really that saccharine and charming all the time.” He smiled charmingly, “I have plenty of women friends. For instance, I’m taking you out for a drink. As your friend.” 

“Cassy, wait up!” Caroline called as she dashed down the sidewalk after her twin.

Cassidy turned around and furrowed her brow. “Hey, what’s up? I thought you and Derek were going out after school…”

“Yeah, well, change of plans. Have you seen Page Six?” 

“Shit. No. What?” Cassidy trotted to keep up with Caroline as she led them to the car. 

“A genuine shit storm.” Caroline shoved the paper into her arms. 

Cassidy stopped to catch the papers and shuffle them together, lest they be lost to the wind. Cassidy flipped the pages until she landed on Page Six and her eyes scanned the pages to find the source of Caroline’s haste.

Caroline stopped to watch her sister find the article and react. She didn’t have long to wait.

“Oh shit.”

It was Wednesday, the eve of her flight to Paris and Andy had been granted early leave, she was dismissed from work to pack. This leave was granted provided she e-mailed the transcription of her interview to Jimmy. 

After two hours of frantic packing she concluded that there weren’t any miracles she could work with her wardrobe, it was what it was. She figured that she could beg Emily to lend her a few things once she landed. 

Exhausted, she e-mailed the wav file to Jimmy and called in her favor for him to transcribe it himself. Weary, she lay herself down on the couch and covered her eyes with her arm. 

Andy was startled awake by the insistent knocking on the door. She sat up and stretched, called out, “coming!” and stumbled to the door.

She rubbed her eyes and pulled the knob revealing the angry looking twins. “Hi?” 

The girls invited themselves in. “You know, for the record,” Cassidy started.

Caroline continued, “we know that our mother is sometimes…”

“Inconsiderate.”

“Thoughtless, even.”

“But she’s a person--”

“--No matter how hard she tries to pretend that she isn’t--”

“—and she has feelings.”

“Whoa, whoa, wait.” Andy tried to slow down the steaming teenagers, “I don’t know what you’re angry about. I haven’t seen your mother since she left for Paris, I’m taking the red eye out to go meet her tonight.” 

“Look, Sachs,” Caroline pursed her lips, “it’s really simple.” 

Cassidy picked up a picture frame from the entryway table, “you break her heart. We break your stuff.” Cassidy let the picture frame fall from her hands.

It thudded on the carpet, drawing all three women’s attentions. Cassidy looked up sheepishly, “that would have been a lot more powerful if it had actually broken…”

“ _I don’t know what you’re talking about_.” Andy insisted. 

“As if.” Caroline rolled her eyes and shoved the newspaper at Andy. 

Andy stared with an open mouth at the picture of Christian and her at the bar. Andy was leaning close to hear him and laughing at a stupid story he had told about the yorkshire terrier in his building. More importantly her heart practically stopped when she read the headline. “That son of a bitch!” 

Andy started cursing and muttering under her breath as the twins looked on with confusion. “God damn him. I _knew_ that he was incapable of being a decent guy. I can’t believe Leslie didn’t call me!” 

Andy pulled her cell phone out of her pocket. “Oh. Bugger. It died again.” Andy walked over to her desk, forgetting that the twins were there, and plugged in the phone. It instantly started beeping incessantly, signaling franticly left voicemails. “ _Daaaamniiiit_.”

“So… it’s not true?”

“No, it’s complete bullshit.” She bit her lip and looked up, “sorry.”

“We’re sixteen, not six.” 

Andy skipped through the voicemails, most of them from Leslie, one from Doug and two from her mother. No voicemails from Miranda. That was a bad sign. “Has your mother seen it?”

The twins shrugged. 

Andy sent the girls to their father’s and spent the following few hours trying to get ahold of Miranda. Failing that, she tried to get ahold of Emily. Failing that she tried to get ahold of Nigel. Andy’s fears were really confirmed when Roy didn’t come to pick her up to go to the airport. 

Miranda had already blacklisted her.

She thanked God that Miranda hadn’t cancelled her ticket. She took it as a glimmer of hope, Miranda had left the ticket for her and Andy had to prove herself by going to Paris and making amends. 

Once she was safely on the plane and reasonably sure that the Air Marshall wouldn’t try to escort her off the plane or shoot her at Miranda request, she tried to call Christian. 

Twice he picked up and barely managed one word before the signal cut out. She knew she was going to have to find him in person in Paris once she found Miranda and made her listen. 

She had her job cut out for her.

It was noon in Paris when she landed and it was one by the time she dragged herself into the lobby of the hotel. “Andy Sachs.” She announced at the front desk.

A surprised French man looked up, “Madame Priestly said you would not be coming.” 

Andy made herself smile, “well, I’m here. I don’t think it really matters who said what, does it?” 

He shook his head. “No, of course not,” he typed a few things into his computer, “but I’m afraid we gave away your room.”

“Just have my bags sent up to Nigel Kipling’s room—for now.” 

“I’ll have to call and check with him.” 

“Yes, that’s fine. I’m sure he’ll be fine with that. The bags are over there, I’m going up to Miranda Priestly’s suite.” Andy turned and walked to the stairs, ignoring the protests of the hotelier. She walked instinctively up to the suite that Miranda always stayed in.

She knocked. Then she knocked again. As she was about to knock the third time, Emily opened the door. “You have nerve.”

“Emily, I really need to talk to Miranda. Can you give us the room?”

“No, shan’t.” She folded her arms across her chest.

“Emily, let her come in. It might be amusing to watch her dig her own grave.” Miranda stuck her head out of the other room. “Take a few minutes, Emily.”

Emily glared at Andy and bumped her on her way out the door. Emily was a lot of things, but disloyal she was not. 

Andy was quiet for a few moments as she watched Miranda standing in the doorway to the sitting room. 

Miranda broke into Andy’s thoughts with a harsh, “don’t just stand there gaping, get in here.” 

Andy closed the door behind her and walked into the room. She reached out for Miranda’s hand but she yanked it away. Andy winced and felt her eyes well up with tears. “Miranda, that’s not fair.”

“ _Not fair_?” Miranda stared at her in wonderment. “I don’t know how you can stand there and talk to me about _not fair_.”

Andy wiped at her eyes. She’d rehearsed a million times what she was going to say to Miranda but as she looked into Miranda’s ice cold blue eyes and felt, for the first time, that there was a real chance their relationship wouldn’t recover, she could do nothing but start crying. 

“It’s not fair that they printed that stupid picture and made up a stupid lie. I went and had a drink with him, he’s a friend.”

“He’s a former lover, Andrea!”

“Jesus, Miranda, I’m _gay_.” Andy drawled, “and, come on, you should know better than anyone that Page Six doesn’t care if what they print is true or not.”

“It makes me look like an old skirt chasing fool!” Miranda snapped, starting to lose her cool. “ _That’s_ not fair, Andrea.” 

Andy wiped at her eyes with fury. “So, it doesn’t even matter to you that it isn’t true?”

“Of course it matters that it isn’t true.” 

“But what? You’re going to break up with me anyway?” Andy demanded, starting to get angry herself. “You are so full of shit, Miranda. You go on and on and on about how you don’t care what the press writes about you and here you are playing right into that. What? It makes you look weak to take me back after I cheat on you? Yeah, you don’t care what other people think, _not at all_.” 

“Stop it!” Miranda barked, “you can’t talk to me that way!”

“Sure I can. I don’t work for you anymore and apparently I’m not dating you anymore so I can say whatever I want! For the record, I think that you’re using this as an excuse to break up with me. I think that you’re scared to death that you _really_ love me because if you love me I can hurt you.” 

Miranda scowled but said nothing.

“And I know this because I love you and you _hurt_ me.” Andy waited for Miranda to speak again. When she didn’t, Andy sighed, “fine. Don’t say anything. I’m leaving.”

“Andrea, wait.” Miranda took a step forward. Andy turned around and folded her arms across her chest. Miranda sighed, knowing that she was going to have to swallow her pride again and admit that she was being an ass -- _as usual_. Though, she’d probably leave the last part out of her apology. 

She sighed again, “Andrea,” there was another long pause, “ _I’m sorry_. The last thing that I want is to break up with you. I love you and I want you to be in my life as long as you want to be.”

Andy softened, knowing that such an honest and vulnerable admission was a big gesture on Miranda’s part. Andy smiled, “so, why aren’t you kissing me yet?”

Miranda smiled, stepping forward, pulling Andy into her arms and kissing her. Miranda laughed softly and broke the kiss, “Andrea, you’re vibrating.”

“Maybe I’m just happy to see you.” She grinned.

“No, really, your cell phone is vibrating.”

Andy blushed a deep red and pulled her cell phone out of her pocket. She looked at the caller id. 

Christian.


	5. Chapter 5

**Rule #5: Mothers are asexual. Don’t ruin the delusion.**

Andy flipped open her phone and immediately launched into her lecture, “you arrogant little fuck!” She yelled.

Miranda scowled at the choice of words but remained silent because she agreed with the sentiment. She folded her arms across her chest. 

“You very nearly ruined my relationship with Miranda, this is one the stupidest, most selfish thing I’ve ever heard of! I can’t believe I thought you were my friend.” 

There was a pregnant pause on the other end before Christian answered, “first of all, I didn’t do it. Page Six isn’t anywhere near my department. Second of all I was just calling you to tell you that I got my editor to print a retraction.”

Andy stuttered, trying to react. 

“ _You’re welcome_.” Christian snapped before hanging up.

Miranda looked at Andy questioningly. “What did he say?” 

Andy bit hr lip, “um, he said that he already talked to his editor about printing a retraction.” 

“That’s good.” Miranda said slowly, wondering why Andy was not visibly soothed by this news and why, in fact, she looked so lugubrious. 

“He had nothing to do with it and I just bitched him out.” She bit her lip. “I’m supposed to be his friend and I feel like an ass.” 

Miranda shrugged, not feeling the same weight of consequence for being an ass than the general populace, considering she was someone whose entire career was built up around her being an ass.

No, this was not an area in which Miranda could empathize. Of that, Andy was aware. She chose to just shrug with resignation and take a brief moment to mourn the probably death of her friendship with Christian – and probably the destruction of any chance to work at the Times. 

“What’s on your schedule tonight?” Andy asked finally, looking up from her thoughts and finding that Miranda had moved over to the chaise. 

Miranda stretched out luxuriously, against the muted pink patterned chaise and looked up at Andy with a twinkle of mischief. Andy bit her lip on a grin. 

“That dinner is tonight.” Miranda said dismissively.

Andy knew that the dinner she was referring to was the most important dinner of fashion week – at least from a journalistic perspective – because it was the dinner that was attended by all of the editors of the represented magazines. It was a dinner at which six different languages were spoken over $600 dinners, and everyone remained tightlipped about their thoughts on the collections while attempting to discuss the collections, alluding that everyone else’s opinion was wrong, even though they all generally had similar opinions. 

Miranda found this dinner tedious, at best. Customarily she spent the dinner pursing her lips and being dismissive with Anna Wintour. Inevitably someone would get drunk, heated multilingual arguments would break out someone would get punched in the face. It was, without a doubt, Miranda’s least favorite part of fashion week. 

Andy, while not interested in reentering the fashion magazine world, would give her right arm to network with that many editors all at once. She watched Miranda with baited breath. “Did you want to accompany me?” Miranda batted her eyelashes innocently. “Nigel had a ticket but he’s spending the night with a hot date, or so I hear.”

“Are you kidding?” Andy grinned.

Miranda smirked a smile, “about the dinner or the date?”

Andy laughed and straddled her hips, kissing her gratefully. Miranda’s hands splayed over Andy’s back as she nuzzled her hair gently. It made her feel good to make Andy happy. 

As per Miranda’s original insistences, the dinner was rather boring. The dinner, however, was phenomenal, Andy thought there must have been some sort of drug in because the more she ate the more she felt encapsulated in a euphoric sensation. 

She sat across the table from Miranda, was wedged between Dieter Bernstein from the German magazine, Hohe Naht, and the obnoxiously loud Saundra Johnstone from a Texas fashion magazine, The Cowgirl’s Guide to Fashion. Miranda would tell Andy about it later, that the magazine itself was a poor excuse for a magazine but Saundra had made a fortune in oil in the last couple of years and had always wanted to run a magazine. Since such time Saundra had made quite a nuisance of herself. 

The two wandered back up to Miranda’s suite after dinner, Andy’s arm hooked through Miranda’s. Miranda pulled out her pass card and said, with a knowing smirk, “I told you the dinner would be tedious.”

“It wasn’t as bad as all that,” Andy insisted, “it was very cool. The food was perfect and it was certainly very interesting to be around all those editors.”

“You’re very kind.”

Andy smiled as Miranda let them in. Miranda stopped short, her path into the room obstructed by a large flower arrangement. She scowled and Andy moved quickly to get it out of Miranda’s way, acting on instinct. 

Miranda sighed and dropped her purse onto the long entryway table. “Who’re they from?”

Andy pulled the card out of the thicket of exotic flowers. She read over it and then smirked sarcastically. She read aloud, “dear Miranda, though we have never had occasion to speak, I think very highly of you and would like to convey my sincerest apologies for the unfortunate Page Six incident. Please accept these flowers as a small token of my regret. Christian.” 

Miranda sat down on the settee, “he’s eloquent, I’ll give him that.” 

Andy rolled her eyes. 

“Come here, don’t think about him.” Miranda held out her arms for Andy, “I would like to enjoy my girlfriend without the burden of her annoyance.” 

“You really know how to sweet talk a girl, Miranda.” Andy grinned amusedly, straddling Miranda’s hips and nuzzling her neck. “You smell so good. Like Prada perfume and sweat and arousal.” 

Miranda quirked an eyebrow with amusement, “you can smell arousal on my neck?” 

“You exude it from every pore.” Andy whispered breathily into her ear. 

Miranda lifted her hips up to Andy’s with a soft sigh. Her eyes slipped shut and she reveled in the feeling of Andy pressing into her. Her fingertips blindly sought out Andy’s skin, moving to the hem of her shirt and pulling it out of the waist of her pants and exposing a small portion of her abdomen.

Miranda’s fingers splayed out over Andy’s soft skin, her other hand promptly joining and together they slid up her torso to slip under her bra and cup her sensitive breasts. Andy groaned and arched into the contact. 

Miranda’s cell phone promptly started to ring. Miranda’s head snapped back alertly.

“Ignore it,” Andy pleaded.

Miranda whimpered, “I can’t, it’s one of the girls.”

Andy reluctantly climbed off of her lover, Miranda stood up, straightened her dress and let out a brief, uncharacteristic, groan of frustration followed by an oddly high pitched exclamation, “I haven’t had sex in a week!” 

She picked her Blackberry up from the table and took a deep breath before answering it. “Yes, Bob?” 

“I wanted to go to the house and get a few things from my room but Dad said I had to call and ask you if that’s okay.” Caroline asked.

Miranda rolled her eyes at her ex-husband, “of course, baby, it’s your house, you have a key, you may go get anything you want.” 

“…why are you out of breath?”

“Gross!” Cassidy exclaimed in the background. 

“Ew, really?” Caroline sneered.

“I can’t talk to you when you’re like this.”

“She didn’t deny it!” Caroline yelled back to Cassidy, who, once again, exclaimed, “gross!”

“Goodnight, girls.” Miranda said pointedly and hung up the phone.


	6. Chapter 6

**Rule #6: We assume you have sex, we don’t need confirmation.**

Cassidy was walking down the hall with Doug on the way to their study hall when Kiki stepped in front of them. Cassidy smiled and Doug clapped her on the back with a grin, “I’ll meet you in there.” 

“You,” Kiki started with a grin, grabbing her by the hand and pulling her into an empty classroom, “are an extremely hard person to track down.”

Cassidy laughed, “what are you talking about? I’ve been in all my regular classes and then I go straight home.”

“That’s just it.” Kiki purred, leaning into Cassidy, “you’ve been _exactly_ where you’re supposed to be which is _exactly_ the last place I’d think to look for you.” 

Cassidy leaned her forehead against Kiki’s, “I’m trying to play nice so I can get ungrounded.” 

“I have a hard time imagining you playing nice.” Kiki whispered.

“Oh, I can play very nice,” Cassidy grinned, she leaned further, closing the space between them and pressing her lips to Kiki’s. 

Cassidy eventually walked into study hall. The annoyed, balding teacher at the front desk looked up at her and scowled, “Ms. Priestly, you’re late. What do you have to say for yourself?”

“I just started my period, Mr. Tadgell, I was bleeding all over the place.” She bit the inside of her cheek to avoid laughing at her teacher’s uncomfortable shifting. “Would you like me to go get a note from the nurse?”

“No, that won’t be necessary.” He stuttered, “just go sit down.”

Doug was sitting with his face in his hands, stifling his laughter. “You’re too much, Cass.” He whispered, reaching out to fist bump her as she sat down.

She grinned, “I do what I can.” 

“Ms. Priestly,” Mr. Tadgell looked up again, “you’re going to be next to go see Ms. Rabikov when Mr. Cooper returns.”

“Who’s Ms. Rabikov?” Cassidy turned to Doug.

“Zoria’s the new guidance counselor, she’s cool, she’s just talking to everyone about classes for next year.” Doug shrugged.

“Zoria? Tall, thin, brunette, high cheek bones, Slavic looking?”

Dough laughed, “her last name is Zoria Rabikov, what do you think?”

“ _Shit_. Shit, shit, shit.”

“What? What’s up?”

“I don’t have time to explain right now.” She dug through her purse for her eyeliner. 

Doug furrowed his brow as she started coloring her eyebrows with it, “you’ll explain later, though, right?” 

“I need to borrow your hat.” She looked up at him once she was done. He continued to stare at her, “ _yes_ , I’ll explain later.”

Francis cooper walked back into the room and down at his desk. Cassidy pulled the hat on, tucking her hair up into it and putting her sunglasses on.

Doug laughed, “damn girl, I don’t get you sometimes. You’re going to the guidance counselor, not knocking over a convenience store.” 

“I hope she hasn’t seen Caroline yet…”

“I think they’re going by study hall.”

“Ms. Priestly,” Mr. Tadgell scowled, nodding towards the door.

“Good, she has study hall 8th period… I’m safe so far.”

“What are you talking about?” Doug was dumbstruck. 

Cassidy got up and walked out, Mr. Tadgell watching her with almost as much curiosity as Doug.

She hung her head slightly as she knocked on the door to the office. Zoria’s bright smile greeted her, “Cassidy, right?”

Cassidy nodded.

“Come in and sit down, I don’t bite.”

Cassidy scoffed as she sat down and confusion flashed across Zoria’s face but she shook it off, “I’ve been going over your transcript, Cassidy, I see that you excel in all your classes but have a tendency to skip classes and you are often late. To me that says that you aren’t being challenged enough and I would like to talk to you about the possibility of taking a few higher level courses. Maybe pick up a second foreign language.” Zoria looked up to see Cassidy still had her head bowed. “Cassidy, are you listening?”

Cassidy nodded. 

“Would you please take the sunglasses and hat off?” Zoria asked gently, “it makes me feel like you aren’t listening to me.” 

“I’m listening.” Cassidy whispered, “higher level classes, second language, please go on.”

Zoria laughed a little, “I have to say that after reading your transcript I have a hard time believing that you’re shy.” She reached forward and gently slid the sunglasses off of Cassidy’s face.

Cassidy cried out, “don’t!” 

Recognition colored Zoria’s face. Hesitantly she reached out and tugged the baseball cap off of her head and her fiery red hair fell around her shoulders. “Oh my god.” Zoria breathed disbelievingly.

“Nobody has to know.” Cassidy shook her head, swallowing hard. 

Miranda was reading through her notes on the plane. An empty wine flute was sitting on the tray in front of her and a sleeping girlfriend was curled up beside her, forehead resting delicately against her shoulder and drooling on the side of her left breast. 

Turbulence rocked the plane gently, Andy’s eyes opened with a start and then relaxed. She sat up and frowned at the drool, she gently wiped at it with her thumb. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”

Miranda smirked with amusement, “you looked so peaceful.” 

“This shirt is worth more than I am.”

“Not in a million years, Andrea.” Miranda ran a finger along her jaw line. Andy melted easily into Miranda’s touch. Miranda leaned down and pressed featherweight kisses along the line traced by her manicured fingernail. “I’m glad you’re awake though.” 

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about something.”

Andy wrapped her arms around Miranda and nuzzled her neck, “what’s that?”

“Cassidy and Caroline.” 

Andy quirked an eyebrow, “…what about them?”

“I would really like to see the three of you getting along.” Miranda said.

“We don’t _not_ get along.” Andy insisted. 

“I know that the way you met up with Cassidy is really a big hindrance but I don’t think you should worry about that because she seems to be over it and she knows how much you mean to me. She’ll be nice, Andrea, I promise.”

“When you’re in the room.” Andy mumbled under her breath. 

“Hm?” Miranda questioned.

Andy shook her head, “nothing… I was just… nothing.”

“I think their feelings were a little hurt when you didn’t come in when you picked me up the other day.” Miranda said, stroking Andy’s hair, “I think they think you don’t like them.”

“I think they don’t like me.” Andy admitted. 

“I’m sure that’s not the case.” Miranda shook her head.

“Why? Because _you_ love me? Did they like Stephen?”

“That’s different. I barely liked Stephen.” 

“ _I_ hated Stephen.” Nigel interjected leaning over the seats. 

Miranda scowled, “no one asked you.” 

“Then talk a little more quietly.” He grumbled, “I was sleeping peacefully until I was awoken by your family conference.” 

Miranda cast him an unamused glare. 

“But on the other hand, Air France gives us earplugs for just such an occasion.” He disappeared behind the seats. 

“What time will it be in New York when we land?” Andy asked.

“It will be 9,” Miranda shuffled her papers. “You’re not off the hook for this conversation. Why do you think the twins don’t like you?” 

“Because…”

“Did they say something to you?”

“…sort of.” Andy tried to quickly weigh the idea of telling Miranda that the girls had threatened her. 

“Well, it really doesn’t matter to me what they said to you because I think the simple answer is that we all need to spend more time together or you could even spend some time with them. I’m sure they’d like that.” 

Andy resisted the urge to scoff. Instead, she nodded. “Yeah. Doing stuff together all four of us sounds good.” 

Cassidy ran down the hallway hoping to catch her sister before she went to study hall. “Caroline!” She shouted, seeing her at her locker, “I need to talk to you!”

Caroline looked up and furrowed her brow at Cassidy. She closed her locker and Cassidy was surprised to see Jason McTeer behind it. 

“That sounds important.” He smiled and reached out and touched her face gently, “I’ll call you later.”

Caroline smiled back at him, swooning subtly as she watched him leave.

Cassidy skidded to a halt and furrowed her brow at her sister. “Was that Jason McTeer? Why was he all up in your business like that?” 

“We’ll talk about it later, what’s wrong?” Caroline insisted, “is it mom?”

“No, no, this is a me issue. A really fucking big issue.” Cassidy dragged Caroline into the bathroom, checked the stalls and then dragged the trashcan in front of the door to block it. 

Caroline laughed, “you’re ridiculous.”

“I have a really big issue, Caroline.” 

Caroline couldn’t hide her amusement. “So you mentioned. It’s last period, kiddo, why can’t this wait?”

“Because you have to go to the guidance counselor this period and talk to the guidance counselor about your classes and that’s the problem.” Caroline opened her mouth to rebut but Cassidy continued, “back when I was still going out to clubs? I met the new guidance counselor…”

“ ‘Met…’ as in…?” 

“Well, I never went all the way with anyone or anything but we definitely made out and she bought me a couple of drinks, I told her I was 18. I got her number and I was totally going to call her but then I ran into Andy and, well, you know that story…”

Caroline stared at her disbelievingly for a few moments, “Cass… how do you get yourself into these situations?” 

“Can we talk about my pattern of self-destructive behavior after you have your PhD in psychology?” 

Caroline smirked. “So, is she going to freak out when she sees me or something?” 

Cassidy shook her head, “no, I told her to be prepared that we’re twins.” 

Caroline sighed, “I don’t know what to say.”

“Well, I didn’t really expect you to say anything and I don’t want a lecture, I just want you to know and be prepared if Zoria treats you a little strangely.”

“Oh, it’s _Zoria_ , is it?” Caroline teased.

Cassidy gave her a playful shove, “she asks everyone to call her Zoria.” 

“I’m ungrounding Cassidy at the end of the month.” Miranda said, Andy looked up from the in flight movie. “We should take the twins out somewhere. Perhaps go to an art show or a concert.” 

Andy nodded slowly, her tired brain refusing to put any effort into focusing on Miranda’s words. “That sounds… good.”

“Is there something else you’d like to do?”

“I can’t really think right now.” Andy admitted, “how are you so awake?”

“It’s mind over matter. I’ve already told my body that it’s New York time.” Miranda explained.

“You’re amazing.” Andy yawned, nuzzling into Miranda’s shoulder and closing her eyes.

Cassidy went straight home to Miranda’s townhouse when school let out. She knew that Miranda would be back that evening so she convinced her father that it would be okay if she went there after school instead of waiting for Miranda to pick her up.

She had expected her twin for dinner. When she failed to show up at five or six and then seven came and went she called her, “hey, where are you? I’m hungry.”

“Cass, I’m sorry. I thought I told you I was going shopping after school and was going to eat out.” 

“No, you definitely didn’t tell me.” 

“Oh, my bad, I guess we spent the whole time talking about you… like usual. So we never really got around to me.” 

Cassidy smirked, “hey don’t be a jerk.” She sighed, “we’d talk about you if you ever did anything that was interesting.”

There was a pause on the other end. “Go fuck yourself.” 

“I do not have to take that.” Cassidy pursed her lips and hung up her phone, tossing it onto the table. A few moments later it started to vibrate as Caroline tried to call back, but she walked into the other room to avoid it. 

She called the Chinese restaurant and ordered herself some chicken chow mein. She took it upstairs and ate it while doing her homework. 

Feet up on her desk, headphones on her ears, a book in her lap and an empty Chinese food box on the floor was how Caroline found her sister when she got home. Cassidy silently mouthed the words to the song as her eyes scanned the pages. Caroline approached and pulled her headphones off.

“Hey!” She protested; startled.

“Sorry.” Caroline set them down on the desk. “I wanted to apologize. I was out of line. We don’t only talk about you. I was sort of deflecting the blame because I knew I forgot to tell you and… I don’t know, like, I’m supposed to be the responsible one so I didn’t want to admit that I’d forgotten.”

Cassidy sighed and shook her head. “Forget about it. I _have_ been really preoccupied lately. How was your evening?”

“It was good.” Caroline said slowly as she sat down on the bed. Her eyes looked down at the floor. “How was yours?”

Cassidy studied Caroline for a moment. When she didn’t answer Caroline looked back up. “What did you do?” Cassidy questioned, “where did you go shopping and who did you go with?”

“Why does it matter?”

Cassidy slowly grinned. “Why are you avoiding the question?”

“I’m not avoiding it, I just think it’s trivial.” Caroline shrugged.

“It’s not trivial.” Cassidy shook her head, “it’s a legitimate question. Where did you go shopping? Did you get anything? What did you have to eat? _Personally_ , I came home, practiced piano, watched a movie, ate Chinese food and did my geometry homework. Now you.”

“I went to Saks and I ate at Le Renard Rouge.” 

“That’s date food. Derek had enough to pay for that? I know he goes to school on a scholarship.” Cassidy caught herself, “I mean, not that it wouldn’t be okay for you to pay. Like, it is such an antiquated idea that a man has to pay all the time. Especially since you have an expense account.”

Caroline shook her head. “I didn’t go with Derek.” There was a long pregnant pause, “I might as well tell you now… I went out with Jason.” 

“Caroline!” Cassidy was wide eyed. “What about Derek?”

“Cass, come on, you know how big my crush on Jason is!” Caroline sputtered, “he asked me out to the prom! We went dress shopping and then we went out to dinner and it was such a beautiful night. He was so sweet.”

“You’re crazy about Derek!” Cassidy objected, “no, no, no. I don’t accept this… you can’t treat him like that. You can’t just throw him over because you got a better offer.”

“Why not? That’s my prerogative! Of course I can have the better offer.”

“Don’t twist my words, I was being facetious. He’s not a better offer, he tortured you when you were a freshman. Derek liked you from the beginning and he’s always been so good to you and he’s crazy about you and Jason’s only interested because you have tits now.”

“Cassidy-!” 

“No, I can’t believe you’d do that to Derek. I can _not_ believe that you would do that. You’re a Priestly! Priestly women are way classier than that!” 

“I don’t want the lecture, not as long as I’m keeping your secret about sleeping with the guidance counselor!”

“Excuse me?” Miranda froze in mid-knock as she stared incredulously at Cassidy. 

Cassidy and Caroline gawked at Miranda wordlessly for a few long moments before Cassidy turned to Caroline and gave her a patented Priestly glare. “Thanks a whole fucking lot. You are so getting that lecture later.” 

Caroline got up off the bed and slipped into their adjoining bathroom and back into her bedroom. 

“Benedict.” Cassidy mumbled underneath her breath.

“Cassidy…” Miranda’s voice drew her attention back, “there are no words…”

“Okay, first of all, I didn’t sleep with her. Caroline was exaggerating to make a point. You can sleep easily, I’m still a virgin.” 

Miranda remained speechless.

“She wasn’t the guidance counselor when I met her, it all happened two months ago, I made out with her at a club _once_ and it was totally my fault, she thought I was eighteen. I don’t want anyone to find out about it because she could lose her job and, like, be labeled a pedophile and never be able to work again and I don’t want that on my conscience. She totally wouldn’t have done it if she knew I was sixteen, she’s not a predator or anything. So, like, this can just be between us, right?” Cassidy bit her lip nervously. 

“Cassidy…”

“Does this affect my end-of-the-month ungrounding?” Cassidy asked, “because I think that it shouldn’t because you grounded me for the sneaking out and clubbing thing and this was included in that, so I think that nothing else should be added on for this.” 

Miranda shook her head, “sweetheart, we’ll talk about it in the morning…” Miranda continued to shake her head. “I… I can’t even think about this right now…” 

Cassidy sighed helplessly as she watched Miranda disappear into the hallway. Cassidy frowned and pushed her books onto her desk, she stood up and stormed into Caroline’s room. 

“Hey!” Caroline objected to the unannounced intrusion.

“You suck!” Cassidy shouted accusingly. “Even if mom doesn’t punish me for that she is never going to think of me the same way. That was not fair!” 

“Don’t yell at me! It’s not my fault that she happened to be there!” 

“That’s true but you didn’t have to say that I slept with her because that is an outright lie!”

“How do I know that? How do I know that you didn’t lie to me about it just so you wouldn’t look like a slut?”

“I have never lied to you, Caroline, I have _never_ lied to you ever. I respect you way too much for that.” Cassidy glared angrily. “If either of us is a slut here it’s _you_!”

“ _Me_?” Caroline demanded indignantly. “ _I’m_ still a virgin!”

“You’re the one who’s cheating on your boyfriend! Let’s not forget that Jason has a reputation and he asked you to the prom.”

“You can _not_ preemptively call me a slut because you think I’m going to sleep with him after the prom.”

“I’ll just call you a trashy little opportunist, then. There’s no presumptuousness there. That’s an accurate statement!” 

“Go fuck yourself!” Caroline sneered. “ _Fuck you_.” 

“Real _fucking_ mature.” Cassidy spat, “what a way with words you have, _God_ you should join the debate team, you truly have a gift for winning arguments. I have no rebuttal for that.” 

“Get out of my room!” Caroline roared, pushing her back towards the doorway. Cassidy pushed back and they both ended up toppling out into the hallway. “Get off my hair!”

“Don’t push me!” Cassidy cursed, shoving Caroline hard to get her off of her. “I can’t breathe!”

“Good, you could use a little less hot air,” Caroline pushed down harder onto her sister, “maybe it’ll make you shut up for once!” 

“Girls!” Miranda ran down the stairs, wrapped in her silk robe, “girls, get up!” She hissed. 

“I’m trying to!” Cassidy protested breathlessly. “Don’t tell me, tell her!” 

Miranda reached down and grabbed Caroline by the shirt and yanked her to her feet. Cassidy rolled over onto her hands and knees and coughed, relieved to have the weight off of her lungs. Andy tentatively watched from the steps. 

“What is wrong with you?” Miranda demanded, “why would you attack your sister? What is going on with you two?” 

“ _Nothing_.” Caroline ground out, avoiding looking at Miranda.

“Nothing, _indeed_ … I was not born yesterday, Caroline.” Miranda shook her head. “You’re grounded for two weeks. We’ll talk about this in the morning.” 

“But mom!” 

“Actions have consequences!” Miranda said calmly. “Whatever your reasons were, there is never a good excuse to physically assault your sister.” 

Caroline and Miranda stared unwaveringly into each other’s eyes for a few minutes. Andy sunk back into the shadows, suddenly terrified of being seen. 

“Am I clear?” Miranda asked tersely. 

Caroline clenched her teeth and pursed her lips but Miranda made sure that she knew that she could wait all night. Caroline sighed angrily. “You’re clear.” 

“Go to bed.” Miranda hissed. She turned to Cassidy who had stood up, “you too. We will all talk in the morning.” 

Miranda stood in the hallway until the twins disappeared begrudgingly into their rooms. She looked back at Andy who stood up a little more bravely once the twins were gone. Miranda wordlessly led the way back up the steps to her bedroom.

Andy hung back in the doorway. Miranda slipped out of her robe, revealing her unfairly flawless body and laid out luxuriously on her bed. 

“Miranda,” Andy said softly, “I think I should go.”

“No.” Miranda said firmly, with the hint of a whine, “the whole household has apparently fallen into chaos and I need you to keep me tethered to reality, I need you to be my sanity.”

“You’re relying on _me_ for sanity?” Andy teased, “you _are_ in trouble.”

Miranda patted the bed next to her and looked up at Andy with insistent eyes. Andy pulled her t-shirt over her head and dropped it onto the chest at the foot of the bed, followed by her shorts. She climbed back onto the bed. 

Miranda nuzzled her neck, kissing it softly, “that’s more like it.” 

Cassidy was laying in bed. Her eyes snapped open when she heard the thud, followed by giggles. Cassidy rolled her eyes and shut them again. There was a long silence before she heard a low moan. 

“Oh Jesus.” She swung her legs around the side of the bed and stood up, “I do not need this tonight.” 

She gathered up her pillow and blanket, descended two levels to the ground floor and curled up on the couch and finally fell asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

**Rule #7: She’s full of surprises. Just roll with it.**

“I don’t think I’m going to come down and have breakfast.” Andy said as Miranda was getting dressed. 

She turned and narrowed her eyes at Andy. She smirked, gave a curt nod and said, “yes, you are.” 

“Miranda… baby steps…” Andy whined from the comfort and warmth of Miranda’s expensive sheets and king sized bed. 

Miranda just smiled and sat back down on the edge of the bed. “You’ll be fine.” 

“I won’t be fine.” Andy said, pouting, “I’m afraid of your children. There. I said it. Are you happy now?” 

Miranda smiled. “My first husband, the one before the girls’ father, he had a daughter and I was petrified of being a bad stepparent or having her hate me. Everyone who goes into a relationship with someone who already has kids goes through this.” 

“Does your story have a happy ending?” Andy asked tentatively, “did she like you? Were you a good stepparent?” 

“I spoiled her rotten, she loved me. It was really because of her that I decided to have children. I pictured them as horrible little monsters who demand things of you but Ava was a really good kid and the only thing that made me sad was that I missed her growing up. She was 14 when I married her father.” 

“Children are scary.”

“Children _are_ scary.” Miranda bit her lip on a grin, “but so are insistent girlfriends.” 

“You aren’t scary.” 

“You take that back.” Miranda kissed Andy, “get dressed. Breakfast is in ten.”

Miranda descended the stairs and knocked on the doors to the girls’ rooms. “Alright ladies, the moment of truth.” 

Caroline emerged looking disgruntled and mad. Miranda nodded towards the stairs, “downstairs. I’ll get your sister and start breakfast.”

Caroline sighed heavily and retreated down the stairs. Miranda knocked on Cassidy’s door, “Cassidy? Cassidy, wake up.”

“She’s down here!” Caroline yelled up the stairs. 

Miranda found Cassidy in the den still wrapped up in an afghan and drooling on her pillow. Miranda leaned down and kissed her forehead, “wake up, Cassidy.”

Cassidy stretched out and looked up at her mother. 

Miranda brushed her red hair off her forehead, “tell me what happened last night with Caroline. Be honest with me.”

“I was really pissed that she said I slept with the guidance counselor because I didn’t and she’s throwing over her very nice boyfriend for this loser and I called her an opportunist and I obviously hit a raw nerve because she got violent and tried to crush my lungs.” Cassidy looked up at her mother deploringly. “Mom, I really didn’t sleep with her, I’ve never slept with anyone. I don’t want you to think of me like that, mom, I don’t want you to think badly of me.” 

“Sweetheart,” Miranda wanted to curtail Cassidy. 

Cassidy was starting to cry. “I don’t want to be the bad twin anymore, mom, I want you to love me and I want you to trust me. I want you to think that I’m a good daughter.”

“I do think you’re a good daughter, Cassidy,” Miranda wrapped her arms around her, “I have never thought of you and your sister as a good and a bad twin. I love you both so much.” 

Cassidy buried her face into Miranda’s lapel and Miranda held her tightly. 

“I’m just tired of this, I’m tired of my attitude. I’m tired of _myself_.” She sobbed.

“Shh,” Miranda cooed against her hair, “it’s okay, Bobbsey.” 

Cassidy smiled at the use of the affectionate nickname. 

Miranda sighed, “sweetie, you’re still ungrounded today. I do believe that you’ve been punished enough and I’ve never grounded either of you over calling each other a name, but I do need your word that you’re done with the clubs until you’re 18 and that you stick with women your age.” 

“I promise, mom, I do.” Cassidy nodded. 

Miranda nodded, “I strongly believe that you’re being sincere. No more calling your sister an opportunist, if you are of the opinion you should try to choose your words with more diplomacy. Surrender your ids and we’ll call it even, baby.” Miranda kissed her forehead. “Go get dressed, breakfast is in a few minutes.” 

Miranda watched Cassidy bound up the steps. She had a feeling that her talk with Caroline wouldn’t end with a kiss on the forehead and a smile. She had a feeling that being Cassidy’s by-the book, by-the-rules-playing twin might have finally taken a toll on her. 

Caroline was sitting in the kitchen with a cereal bowl in front of her, absently kicking the stool next to her. Miranda sat on it and Caroline looked up; coldly. 

“I don’t want to talk about it.” 

“Tough luck, then.” Miranda crossed her arms across her chest. “I am extremely upset that you would attack your sister. There is no good excuse for your actions last night.”

“Mom, you weren’t there, you didn’t hear what she said!” Caroline protested.

Miranda held up a hand, “you don’t _ever_ attack your sister. Not _ever_. Do you hear me?”

“ _Yes._ ” 

“You’re going to apologize to your sister.” Miranda continued.

“No. Well… maybe if she apologizes to me first.” Caroline grumbled.

“Not conditional. You have to apologize.” Miranda shook her head, “and you’re grounded for two weeks.” 

“No! I got asked to go to the prom, it’s tonight!” Caroline jumped off of her stool and stared at Miranda in disbelief.

“You’re a sophomore, you have two more opportunities to go to prom.”

“Not with this guy, mom, he’s a senior!”

“I hope that wasn’t meant to make me want to let you go.” Miranda furrowed her brow. She shook her head, “sweetheart, I will not go back on my position. That is the one thing I will not tolerate.” 

Cassidy entered the kitchen. The tension was thick. She glanced at Caroline out of the corner of her eye before holding the fake id out to Miranda. Miranda took it and slipped it into her pocket. 

Caroline was shooting daggers at Cassidy as she stood there smiling. Miranda turned to Caroline, “isn’t there something you’d like to say?”

“Not even a little bit.” Caroline steeled herself. 

“Fine. I’m happy to extend your punishment a day for each day you don’t apologize.” Miranda turned to Cassidy, “would you apologize to your sister for insulting her?”

“I’m sorry that I misjudged you.” Cassidy said plainly as she grabbed a cereal bowl from the cupboard and emptied Cheerios into it.

“That wasn’t an apology.” Caroline protested in a mumble. 

“Mom,” Cassidy smiled hugely at her mother, “may I go out after school today?”

“Yes, you may, darling.” Miranda nodded. She glanced at the time and wondered if Andy had made good on her threat to slip out and escaped down the fire escape. 

Andy hesitantly appeared in the doorway. “Morning.” She said softly and self-consciously. 

Miranda smiled, Caroline grunted with annoyance and Cassidy crunched a mouthful of cereal with a small nod of reciprocation. 

Andy moved silently through the kitchen getting a glass for orange juice, a mug for coffee and a plate for a pastry. She sat down wordlessly with Miranda on one side of the kitchen island. 

Miranda drank her strong and bitter black coffee and mused on her little family which consisted of feuding twins and a sheepish lover. She would admit that there would have been better mornings for them to all share together but she thought that it was just as important for Andy to spend a bad morning with them as a good morning. 

Andy drank the orange juice and avoided the coffee, afraid that the caffeine woul send her heart rate further through the roof. 

The girls’ beepers went off and they silently slid off their stools, setting the bowls in the sink and leaving the room.

Miranda set down her coffee and turned to Andy. “That didn’t kill you.” 

“Very nearly.” Andy didn’t want to admit that it wasn’t as bad as she’d thought. At the very least, all of the girls’ anger was so focussed on each other that they couldn’t be bothered to turn it to Andy. The best time to be integrated was when the twins weren’t a united force, a singular entity, when they didn’t operate on the principle of mob mentality. Maybe one of the twins would like her, maybe both of them or neither of them, but at least she had a fighting chance if they both formed singular opinions.

Miranda ran her fingers through Andy’s hair. “I have to go to Runway.” 

“I know,” Andy nodded, leaning into the touch, soothed by the tender stroking. Miranda’s long, thin fingers glided over her scalp, scraping manicured fingernails against the sensitive skin, setting off a rush of good feelings. 

“I want to see you when I get home.” Miranda whispered against her jaw, “I won’t be gone long. I just have a couple of run throughs.”

Andy smiled, remembering the run throughs all too well. “Early in the issue,” she nodded, “you get more free time.” 

“That’s right. They have to have time to come up with ideas for me to shoot down.” Miranda nuzzled behind Andy’s ear. “You should stay here. I want this to feel like another home for you.” 

The girls were silent the whole ride to school which unnerved Taylor greatly. Even when they were in bad moods they were never silent. Something had to be extremely wrong for such a deafening silence. 

When the car stopped, Cassidy was the first out of the car, hoping to find Kiki before first period began. She found her at her locker. Cassidy smiled from ear to ear as she approached. Kiki turned and returned the smile. 

“You look like you’re in a good mood this morning.”

Cassidy laughed, “it’s kind of both, good and bad, but it’s really good now that I’m seeing you.” She leaned in, “Kiki, would you like to go out with me after school?”

Kiki grinned, “you’re ungrounded! Can we make it a little later, I want to get home and get dressed up first. This’ll be my first date.”

“Mine too.” Cassidy smiled, she looked at her cell phone, “I have to go talk to the guidance counselor before home room.”

Kiki leaned in and stole a kiss with a grin before Cassidy gave her hand a squeeze and ran off in the direction of Zoria’s office. She knocked on the door frame. Zoria jumped a little. “Cassidy… you startled me.”

“No kidding.” She stepped inside and closed the door. “I just wanted to see if you were cool.”

Zoria lifted an eyebrow. “Cool?”

“Yeah, like, I don’t say anything, you don’t say anything. You keep your job and all that jazz.” 

“Yeah. In fact, I think we should both stop talking about it all together.” Zoria sat down at her desk. “I think we should have stopped talking about it 10 minutes ago.” 

“Sweet.” Cassidy smiled, “oh and put me down for German and… I’ll take trig, I guess.”

“I’ll make a note. You’d better get to class.” Zoria shooed her out of the room. 

“It’s just stupid.” Caroline shook her head, comiserating with Rebecca, who was planning to attend prom that night with her boyfriend, Jackson. 

“It is stupid. I think you’re entitled to whatever you want. Cassidy was totally out of line calling you an opportunist. You worshipped Jason, it’s about time he started worshipping you.” Rebecca said with authority. “Personally, I think Derek would understand. I mean, like, what if Megan Fox was suddenly all over him, right? You wouldn’t stand in his way, would you?” 

“Hell no. I would _so_ understand.” Caroline pushed food around her plate. She sighed heavily, “I just feel like everthing’s always about Cassidy. Cassidy’s the adventurous one who has a fake id, goes to clubs, hooks up with older people and gets everything she wants all the time.” 

“You could use the same fake id. You could borrow it.”

Caroline shook her head with resignation, “nah, she handed it over to my mom this morning.” 

“So what are you going to tell Jason about the prom?” Rebecca asked as her cell phone beeped. She opened it, read a text, texted back and put the phone away. 

Caroline shrugged, “I guess I’m going to tell him to have fun…” 

“Oh babe, that really sucks.” Rebecca pouted.

“Yeah, well, them’s the breaks.” Caroline put the last of her lunch into her mouth, chewed and swallowed. “My mother’s double standard has spoken.” 

Cassidy slammed her locker shut, still infuriated from having told the story of fighting with Caroline to Doug. “She’s just being a total douche about the whole thing.” 

“Yeah, sounds it.” Doug agreed with a nod. “But what are you going to do? Straight women are overly emotional and irrational.”

“Amen to that, brother.” Cassidy laughed. 

“Hey Cassidy,” Derek waved as he approached. “I don’t wanna interrupt but do you know where Caroline is?” 

“No, I don’t.” Cassidy shook her head, “sorry.”

“It’s cool. I don’t expect you to keep tabs on her or have some sort of twin GPS or anything,” he smiled charmingly. “I’ll find her eventually, I have to go to class anyway.”

He turned to leave, but Cassidy stopped him. “Hey Derek?”

“Yeah?”

“I have to tell you something. Caroline-” Cassidy’s sentence came to an abrupt stop as Doug elbowed her. She sighed, “maybe she’s in the caf?” 

“She has first lunch, but I could check there.” He nodded, “thanks.” 

They watched him fade into the crowd of students before Doug rolled his eyes at her, “you can’t _tell_ him.”

“He should know!” 

“Yes, he should. Caroline should tell him.” 

“But what if she doesn’t tell him?” Cassidy insisted, “all it takes for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.”

“Even the devil can quote scripture to suit his needs.” Doug quoted.

Cassidy scowled, “and just what do you mean by that?”

“What I mean is that just because you can back up your argument with a literary quote doesn’t mean it’s a good idea.” 

Cassidy hmphed. 

“Hey, come on. Let’s talk about something happier.” Doug nudged her, “where are you taking Kiki out to?”

“I’m thinking I’m going to pull out all the stops. Get her flowers and take her out to a fancy dinner and then a stroll through Central Park.”

“You are such a sap. Whoever said lesbians had more testosterone never met you.”

“Yeah, well, whoever said that men have more testosterone never met _you_.” Cassidy teased. 

“Ha, ha, ha.” Doug gave her a playful shove, “go to English, I’ll see you in study hall.” 

Jason cornered Caroline at her locker before last period. “Hey, word on the grapevine is that you’re standing me up.” His smile was dangerously charming. 

Caroline smiled and shook her head, “not by choice, believe me.” Caroline shoved her books into the locker, “my mother grounded me.” 

“I thought you were a young woman and not a kid.”

“I am.” Caroline insisted, “I’m not a kid. I’m a woman.”

“Women don’t get grounded by their mothers.” Jason grinned teasingly.

“That’s where you’re wrong. Anyone can be grounded by Miranda Priestly.” She laughed. “She proves that daily.”

“I made us reservations for after the prom.” He continued, “I was thinking room service might be a nice dinner.” 

Caroline smiled and sighed with disappointment, “I can’t.”

Jason started to scribble something on a piece of paper. She watched him curiously and he slipped it into her hand, “this is the time and place. I’d obviously like you to come to prom, but if you can only make it to one…”

She closed her hand around the paper and looked up into his eyes. He leaned down and kissed her softly. “I hope to see you there.”

Cassidy opted to take the subway home instead of enduring her sister. Caroline, of course, took a great deal of personal offense and decided to sit in the sitting room to wait for her to give her a piece of her mind. 

Caroline sat on the settee with her books and sat to wait. Her ears pricked up as she heard her mother’s voice. She looked at her cell phone, it was 2:50p.m. and she was stunned that Miranda was at home. Then she heard Andy’s voice. 

Her first reaction was to roll her eyes. Then after a few moments of their hushed, familiar voices she began to grow cruiouser and curiouser. She found that she’d stood up and started to walk closer to the door to hear better. 

Coffee splashed into a mug. 

Caroline leaned into the door, pressing her ear to the wood and straining. 

“I love you, too,” Andy said. 

“I actually need to preface this by saying that I can’t believe I’m about to say this. I have typically been a very reserved person in the face of blossoming relationships. Admittedly, my reluctance to move forward may have lead to the inevitable downfall.” Miranda sipped the coffee and took a short pause, “you’ve pushed me out of my comfort zone in more ways than one. I expected to drown, I thought that being thrust into unfamiliar territory would be the emotional equivalent of being thrown to the wolves, but you didn’t let me drown.”

Caroline wasn’t sure if she wanted to cry or throw up. 

“I want you to consider moving in. Here. With me. And the girls.” Andy started to say something to react but Miranda spoke up again, “think about it. I know that it’s something that requires thought and I don’t expect an answer right now.”

“Miranda-”

Andy’s words were interrupted by the ringing of Miranda’s cell phone. She answered it, “Nigel, whatever it is, it can wait.” There was a pause. “Give me a moment, I’ll go upstairs and e-mail it to you.” 

Caroline jumped back and moved back to the couch to pretend that she’d been reading the whole time. Miranda emerged from the room. “Good afternoon, Caroline.” 

Caroline grunted a response, not ready to forgive Miranda for being grounded. 

Miranda sighed heavily and silently before climbing the stairs. Once Caroline heard the door close upstairs she walked straight into the kitchen.

Andy saw her and jumped. “Oh… Caroline… you scare me -- _scared_ , I mean. You did scare me. Just now. Not in general.” 

“Real smooth.” Caroline rolled her eyes. She grabbed the orange juice from the refrigerator and poured it as Andy watched her nervously. “Look.” She said finally, standing in front of Andy. 

Andy gulped.

“I think you should move in.” Caroline nodded, “I mean, if me and Cassidy are the reason for you to hesitate, fuck it. Just do it. If you really do love my mother like you say you do, you should move in.” 

“Caroline, I-” Andy started.

“Don’t get sentimental with me. I am absolutely not in the mood.” Caroline gathered up her juice and returned to her place on the settee. 

Cassidy stood on the front stoop of the townhouse and looked at the door. She knew that Caroline would be lying in wait to give her a piece of her mind but she also knew that nothing could spoil her good mood. 

The door opened and Caroline looked up from the settee. The fire she’d felt earlier dissipated when she saw her sister. She looked back down at her book. 

Cassidy stood there for a moment before going up the stairs. She stopped short of running into Miranda. 

“Hi baby, I thought you were going out.” 

“Gotta get dressed up.” Cassidy grinned.


	8. Chapter 8

**Rule #8: Just because she loves you doesn’t make you our parent.**

Cassidy’s cell phone rang. She looked over at Kiki, who looked back understandingly. Cassidy flipped it open, “hey, mom. Is this important?” 

“Cassidy, did you take your fake id?”

“What? No. I handed it to you this morning and didn’t looked back.” Cassidy switched the phone to the other side, “you put it in your jacket pocket.”

“I thought so too.”

“No, you def did.” Cassidy paused for a moment, she bit her lip and looked sideways at Kiki. “Maybe you moved it.”

“Maybe I did.” Miranda conceded, “I’ll look again.” 

“Kay. Bye mum. I’ll see you later.” Cassidy hung up the phone and turned to Kiki.

“I can see the wheels in your head turning, what’s up?” 

“I handed over my fake id to my mother this morning and now it’s gone missing. I think Cassidy took it.” Cassidy scrolled through the contacts on her phone, “I hate to do this, Kiki, but I think we have to rescue my idiot sister from doing something monumentally stupid.”

Kiki laughed, “count me in.” 

She put the phone to her ear. “Hey Derek. You live near Times Square and you have a car, right?” She paused. “Good. I’m with Kiki, would you come pick us up?”

Caroline dropped down from the fire escape. She grinned because she had Cassidy to thank for that trick, she had Cassidy to thank for the fake id in her pocket. In short, she had Cassidy to thank for breaking rules – and laws – so Caroline could learn the tricks, but also learn from her sister’s mistakes. 

She jogged down the road and didn’t start to walk normally until she turned the corner, she was paranoid that Miranda would look out the window and see her. With any luck she wouldn’t even know she was gone. With any luck the evening would go off without a hitch. 

She descended the subway stairs, looked at the piece of paper that Jason had given her and found the right subway car. Her next order of business was to turn off her phone, lest Miranda discover her absence and try to call her. 

If Miranda did find out, she’d deal with that tomorrow. Tonight was for breaking rules and answering to no one, tonight was for getting a hotel room with the boy she’d been _in love_ with since Freshman year, tonight was for no regrets.

Derek pulled up in his 1998 Toyota Corolla. 

Cassidy and Kiki climbed into car and buckled up. 

“Are you guys okay?” Derek asked with concern.

“Yeah, we’re fine.” Cassidy nodded hastily, “it’s Caroline we’re worried about.”

“Oh no. Where is she?”

“I don’t know yet.” Cassidy admitted. Her phone rang. “Hold on.” She flipped it open, “Jane, you’re a saint, what can you tell me?” 

“Well, Jason is already gone but the entire rest of the lacrosse team is talking about the Hilton hotel. I’d bet that Jason is taking Caroline there too. Espesh because his cousin Josh works there. The skeeze tried to pick me up in December. Jason and Josh are totally tight, so it’s absolutely your best bet.” 

“Wonderful. Enjoy the rest of the prom. Tell me all about it on Monday.”

“Will do. Enjoy what’s left of your date.”

Cassidy closed the phone. “The Hilton. Go.” 

“What’s going on?” Derek asked as he turned onto the main road and turned toward the Hilton. 

“Caroline has fallen under the dark and powerful spell of Jason McTeer.” 

Derek looked hurt, “what?”

“For what it’s worth, I think that it’s rooted in a feeling of inadequacy. She’s worried that she’s not desirable so basically any advance becomes a welcome advance.”

“Jason McTeer advanced on her?” 

“He asked her to the prom and then to a hotel.”

“Holy shit.”

“And I can totally understand if you’re pissed. I would be. But we can both agree that she shouldn’t be making an impulsive decision, right?”

Derek was silent, but nodded. She knew it was a lot to take in. 

Kiki leaned over the seat and took Cassidy’s hand. Cassidy leaned down and kissed it. 

Miranda handed Andy a glass of wine. She hadn’t heard a peep out of Caroline since dinner, she figured she must be really upset about the prom. Miranda did not feel bad. She knew that she’d make the same decision again.

But still, it wrenched at her insides to have either of the twins mad at her.

Andy sensed Miranda’s discordant feelings. She tugged on Miranda’s hand until she sat down on the loveseat with her. Miranda smiled at Andy and lay her legs over her lap. Andy rested her forehead against Miranda’s.

Soft kisses were peppered along Miranda’s jaw line. She mmed and tilted her head. “Sweetheart,” Andy said, punctuating the term of endearment with a kiss placed behind Miranda’s ear, “about moving in.”

Miranda held her breath, afraid to hope. “Mhm?” She sipped her wine and feigned nonchalance. 

“I would love to move in.” Andy whispered into her ear.

Miranda turned to her, “but?”

Andy laughed, “no buts, Miranda, I want to move in. I’m really happy that you asked me and I’m saying yes before you have a chance to come to your senses and rescind the invitation.”

Miranda’s grin was ear to ear and Andy didn’t think she’d ever seen a more genuinely sincere emotion. 

Cassidy, Kiki and Derek walked through the front doors of the Hilton. The aforementioned cousin Josh looked up from the front desk and furrowed his brow. Kiki and Derek separated from her to avoid drawing suspicion. 

“Caroline.” Josh said in surprise. Cassidy bit the inside of her lip to keep from insisting she wasn’t her sister. “Didn’t you just go upstairs?”

“I forgot something.” Cassidy laughed, “stupid me. You know how stupid I am sometimes. Or _all the time_ , basically.” 

Josh laughed a little, confused by her behavior. 

“Could you remind me what the room number is?” 

“Yeah, sure, it’s 510.” He grinned, “I just sent up a bottle of wine and everything. You’re in for a good time.”

“Oh, I don’t doubt it.” Cassidy rolled her eyes as soon as she turned away and met up with Cassidy and Derek by the elevator. 

“510.” She announced as Derek reached for the buttons. 

Cassidy reached over and put her hand on Derek's shoulder. "Talk to me, Derek. Tell me how you're feeling. Are you cool with this or should I go in and get her?"

"Well, Cass, I can't say that I'm not pissed." He sighed. "But I have to do this."

"Are you going to keep your cool, though?"

He quirked a small smile, "have you ever known me to lose my cool?"

Cassidy nodded. "Okay, cool." 

The elevator doors slid open and as Cassidy and Derek went to step out, Kiki grabbed Cassidy's hand. 

"What's up?" 

Kiki smiled at Cassidy, "you're such a good person. You have such a good heart." Kiki squeezed her hand and leaned up and kissed Cassidy, "I want you to know that I'm completely head over heels for you." 

Cassidy grinned playfully, "I kind of had a feeling." 

Kiki and Cassidy walked up to 510 to see Derek standing in front of the door. "What if they're... what if that's really what she wants?"

"One way or another I'm knocking on that door." Cassidy pointed, "this isn't just about you two." 

"Do what you gotta do." Derek motioned to the door and stepped back to stand behind her next to Kiki.

Cassidy pounded on the door. "Open up."

"Get lost!" Jason hissed from inside.

"Bitch, I said open the damn door!" Cassidy shouted. 

"Jesus. Hold your horses." There was a rustle in the room and then the door was flung open by a shirtless Jason McTeer. "What? Caroline, you were in the bathroom..." 

Cassidy stepped into the room, "Caroline, get out here!"

Caroline came out of the bathroom, her eyes wide, "what the hell are you doing here?" 

"I think you're being impulsive and I think you need to think about this."

"Thinking about it's all she's been doing." Jason rolled his eyes. "Unless you're joining in why don't you take your frigid sister home with you." 

Derek walked into the room. "Hey."

"Derek... Walsh?" Jason narrowed his eyes at him, "what are _you_ doing here?"

"I'm her boyfriend." Derek glared at him, "and you have no respect for women."

"What are you? Gay?" 

"Hey, hey, hey. Cool it on the gay stuff." Cassidy stepped in. 

"Whatever, why don't you all just clear out? Maybe I can get back to the prom before it ends." 

"Hey. Hold on." Derek put a hand on Jason's arm.

Jason rolled his shoulder and pulled away from him. "I don't like being touched by _trash_." 

Derek pulled back his fist and slammed it into Jason's jaw. Jason stumbled back and fell against the wall. Jason narrowed his eyes and charged at Derek.

"Stop it!" Caroline yelled, she grabbed Derek's arm and yanked him out of the way. Jason slammed into the opposite wall. 

Jason seethed, Derek's nostrils flared. Cassidy looked around nervously, Caroline clutched Derek protectively, holding him close. 

"We're going. We're all going." Caroline insisted. "Nobody needs to hit anybody else."

"Then go!" Jason yelled.

Cassidy was the first one out the door. She joined Kiki in the hallway, took her hand and kissed her softly. Caroline and Derek exited next and the door was slammed shut behind them. 

Caroline held onto Derek's bicep tightly. "Cassidy told you everything?" She asked softly and Derek nodded. "And you came."

"I had to protect your honor." 

"I don't think I have much honor left." Caroline sighed, "I mean, you know, I didn't do anything... I thought I wanted to, I planned to... but I didn't want to once I got here. I just... I thought of you. I shouldn't have even gone out with him in the first place."

"You should have told me... you should have talked to me..." Derek said softly.

"I know." 

The four of them stepped out into the night. 

"Hey," Cassidy said softly, reaching out and putting her hand on Caroline's arm. "I'm going to have Taylor come pick us up, we'll go home and keep mom distracted and you can sneak back up into your room."

"Jesus..." Caroline closed her eyes, "you're being way too nice to me." 

"Don't give me a chance to change my mind. Besides, you and Derek need to talk." 

Caroline smiled gratefully. "You're a really good sister. Maybe I can repay the favor sometime."

"I'm repaying the favor to you from your telling me what a douche I was about mom and Andy." Cassidy shrugged, "just forget about it. I'll see you at home in a bit."

Once Cassidy and Kiki were in the back of the Rolls, Cassidy gave Kiki's hand a squeeze. "I'm sorry this was a really lame date."

"Are you kidding? It was a really action packed date." She laughed, "and you did a lot of good. I think that you should feel really proud of your evening."

Cassidy pulled Kiki close, Kiki draped her legs over Cassidy's lap and wrapped her arms around her shoulders. "Do you want Taylor to drop you home or would you like to come home with me?" 

"I'm not expected at home until midnight..." Kiki grinned.

Cassidy grinned back, pulling her close and kissing her. 

The front door opened and Miranda got up off the settee. She set down The Book next to Andy who looked up from her laptop. 

"Cass, could you join us in the sitting room?" Miranda called. Andy shut her laptop and set it on the coffee table. 

Cassidy entered the sitting room Kiki's hand in hers as she did. "Oh, hello." Miranda smiled at Kiki. "How was your date?"

"Kind of still going." Cassidy admitted, "you wanted to talk to me about something?"

"I wanted to tell you that," Miranda looked at Andy and then back to her daughter, "I asked Andrea to move in with us and she accepted."

"Sweet." Cassidy nodded, "congrats." She paused, "can I be the one to tell Caroline?"

"If you'd like. Tell her we can talk about it in the morning, too. About what it all means and everything." 

"Okay." Cassidy nodded. 

"Enjoy the rest of your date." Miranda smiled, "it was nice to see you again Kiki."

"Thanks, Ms. Priestly, nice to see you again too." 

Andy smiled at Miranda as she watched the two girls leave the room. "Miranda," she said. Her white haired lover turned, "come here." 

Caroline stood with Derek underneath the fire escape. "Are we... going to be okay?" She asked.

He nodded, "yeah, I think so." He brushed the hair out of her eyes. He leaned in and kissed her softly. "Goodnight. I'll call you tomorrow."


End file.
